Self-care is not just the products you use.
- Nipuni Thisarangi Dissanaayake
- Nov 15, 2020
- 10 min read
Self-care is not just the products you use.
“Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. It is not something physical".
-Sophia Loren-
As I always believe, beauty is inside out. Your face and physical appearance is just a reflection of how you feel inside and how healthy you are within. You cannot achieve your highest level of “Looking Good”, just by using the best products in the world or with the most expensive treatment. No matter how much money you spend on your beauty products and makeup if you are not working on your mind, body, and soul together. I have started my self-care journey a couple of years back. At the very beginning, I was not in a state to invest a lot in products, but I started with very basics. In my self-care journey, I have identified what it takes to be beautiful inside out and learned with my own experience. Here is what I have discovered so far:
1. Accept yourself, Love yourself.
We all are born uniquely. I do not think there will be a single human being in this world that is perfect, not even a celebrity. We only know and see what they choose to show. We do not know their journey, and we cannot have the same genes, social status, weather, or financial level they live. So, the first thing is, we have to be happy and grateful for what we have now. We have to embrace what we are and accept ourselves with all the flaws, Imperfections, and insecurities. If you try to love the future self of yours without loving yourself now, you will never be able to see that future self, and at the end of the journey, you will lose yourself. Do not get into that trap.
2. Discipline
Pretty much everything I am sharing after this will have a link to this point. You might wonder how discipline becomes a supporting factor in being beautiful. As I believe, discipline is the foundation of everything in life. Without self-discipline, you cannot achieve success in anything. If you have that self-discipline with you only, you will be able to take care of yourself. You have to have a routine to do your skincare, you should practice good hygiene, you should eat a decent diet, you should not be lazy to go to sleep without removing your makeup, and you have to keep your practices consistent. So, without a good self mastering discipline, you will not be able to hold on to your things together.
3. Consistency
Whatever you do, you should have consistency with your actions. You cannot achieve overnight results, and I do not believe in instant results either. You have to practice every day what you have chosen for yourself. Then only your body learns your pattern and adjusts with you. You cannot just complain about your fat belly by just practicing your 6 step morning workout once a month. Give yourself time and space but at the same time, do things with care.
4. Good Hygiene
Being beautiful is not just your 10 step skincare, 6 step hair care, and monthly beauty spa session. Your beauty care will start from the moment you wake up from your bed until you are going to sleep again. You better look at your hygiene habits to keep up with your self-care game. It is sometimes the tiny things we neglect that have a significant impact. Here are some good hygiene practices you to follow:
Change your bed linen every week and if possible, keep your pillows in the sunlight once a week or two.
Wash your towels often, at least once a week, and do not use the same towel for body, face, and hair.
Wash your combs, makeup brushes, hair clips, and hair bands at least once a week, and air dry in the sunlight.
Keep your nails cut and clean. Do not keep nail polish for more than one week.
Wash your clothes properly, air dry them in sunlight, and distinctly, undergarments. Do not wear damp clothes or undergarments.
Keep your room and wardrobe clean and tidy.
Wash your hand before and after meals and after using washrooms.
Brush your teeth twice a day.
Do not pick on your face, eyes, nose, and ears.
5. Sweat it out
Engaging in physical activity gives you numerous benefits. It is up to you to select what you are going to do, but I think you should at least do one activity. You can work out, go for regular walks, do yoga, join Zumba or dancing class, or any sport. Sweating out will help to flow out toxins from your body, and it improves blood circulation and helps to deliver oxygen and nutrients to the organs which keep the body healthy. It promotes collagen production and cell regeneration, which keeps the skin looking glowy, and it is also helpful for anti-aging. I love to see the glow in my skin after a good workout or yoga session. It is a great satisfaction.
6. Decent Diet
Well, you might tell this is self-sacrifice, but I see this as an investment. Investment in my health and long term joy. Diet is not starving yourself to death. Small changes in your day to day eating habits will save you in the future. Also, diet is not just what you eat; it is also how you eat. However, I do not mind being self-control in my day to day life because when it comes to special occasions, I know I can enjoy to the maximum limit I want, and I do not feel like sacrificing at all. See whether what you can do from below.
Reduce Sugar, salt, and oil consumption.
Red rice over white rice, and a small amount of rice with a lot of vegetables and green leaves.
Reduce processed meat and meat items.
Fresh fruit juice and smoothies over carbonated drinks.
Drink 2L of water per day.
No junk food. No instant food.
Green tea and matcha over tea and coffee.
Reduce coffee intake.
Eat medium heavily in the morning, heavy meal at noon, and a light meal at dinner.
No snacking in between main meals.
Eat on time; Eat 2 hours before bedtime; Do not skip breakfast.
7. Sleep
Sleep is often a thing that we take for granted. Sleep is vital for proper functioning in a body like food. Experts recommend 7 to 9 hours of sleep for an adult. There will be times that you have to sacrifice your sleep for required future investments but, I do not see any good in skipping your brain break for binge-watching your favorite Netflix show or scrolling down on social media. Choose your priorities wisely. Sleep enables the body to repair and be fit and ready for another day. Having enough sleep will avoid excess weight gain, heart and brain diseases, and your face and eyes will not look tired. I invest 7 to 8 hours of sleep most of the time, which enables me to work on my full potential in the remaining 16 hours.
8. Attitude and Passion
Just like discipline and consistency, whatever you do in life, you should have a positive attitude towards what you do, and you should do it with a passion. You should not do things merely because of someone saying something to you. If you are comfortable with who you are now, you should not torture yourself to workout, going on a diet, or adopting to a skincare routine. Self-care is taking care of yourself, not pleasing others. Before you are going to make others happy, you should feel good about yourself. And that is not selfish at all. If you are not happy to workout every day, then do not do it. But, if you want to do it, do it with a positive attitude and for yourself, not for others, not because of all of your friends doing nor because that is what your Ex’s new partner is doing. When you are doing things for yourself, it should not feel like a burden to you. You should do it happily and with full of love, and that is how you are going to see the results.
9. Meditation/Mindfulness/Compassion
Being a Buddhist follower from the day I was born helps to nurture the importance of mindfulness in my mind from a very young age. But I took its benefit after passing all my darker days. If you can invest good 15 -30 minutes every day to practice meditation and mindfulness regardless of your religious views, you will be able to see improvement in yourself. Practicing mindfulness helps you to focus, calm your mind, and be collected. I am not knowledgeable enough to convince you about this, but all I know is, this helps me a lot to find the light within myself.
10. How well do you know yourself - Self Awareness
Self-care is a journey, and it is a part of your day-to-day life. It is that you are in full control of yourself. To decide what is best for you depends on who you are. Just because your friend does 90 minutes workout, does not mean that it will work for you first. Nevertheless, if everyone on the internet uses brand X does not imply it will work on your skin too. We all have our characteristics, unique features, and our rhythms. Give yourself time, listen to yourself, explore yourself, and learn about yourself. And, it is not a one night task. Throughout your journey, you will learn about yourself. Then adopt with it. Do not be so hard on yourself. Again, do what is best for you, and No! you do not need validations and, you do not own any explanations to anyone.
11. Be Happy! Be Grateful! Be Kind!
As Sophia Loren said above, beauty is how you feel inside. No matter what you wear, if you are not happy and your mind is not clean, it will reflect from your physical self. I know, when I do not contend, no matter how hard I try, I look sick and tired. We do not need much to feel good. We need just one instinct, and that is the desire to be happy. If you want to be happy; then BE! It is that simple. We often postponed our happiness with things. I will be alright when I have glass skin; I will be happy when I get into shape; I will be happy when I get a promotion, but have you ever been happy when you achieve that? Did that happiness last? You will set another milestone in the next minute to be happy. Just be present, enjoy the moment and be grateful for what you are now. This simple rule changed me a lot, and I took a considerable amount of time to understand it. Be thankful for what you are, what you have, and the people around you. Because we never know about the future. Have a gratitude journal and happiness jar. You might see these are silly, childish things. But, it has a deep meaning.
12. Invest in Routines
People often ask me, how are you doing all these? How do you wake up so early? Do you forget what to apply at AM and what is at PM? Well, since I am doing it all with love and care for myself, I do not forget those. Besides, when you are doing the same thing for some time, you will get used to it. I have a morning routine, day time routine, and evening routine. Having a routine does not mean that I am working on a timetable or limiting myself. It is like pre prioritizing your day to day needs. Which feels good. Have you ever heard the 21/90 rule? The 21/90 rule shows, it takes 21 days to make a habit and 90 days to make it a permanent lifestyle change. Is there a new lifestyle change you would like to make? Commit to your goal for 21 days; it will become a habit. Commit to your goal for 90 days; it will become a part of your lifestyle. Again you can see how discipline and consistency come to play with this.
13. Take a Rest
It is not a sin to take a break when you need it. Having a break is not an unproductive thing and not a waste. Use that time to spend with your loved ones, go on a vacation, go shopping, have a spa day, or else you can sleep all day. That is alright; you deserve that. If you want, you can use your leisure time to do something you love, develop a new hobby, or learn something new. Whatever you decide to do, use that time to forget all your other work and show some love towards you.
14. Declutter
Do not involve yourself in unnecessary drama or negativity. Declutter your home, your wardrobe, your phone, and your social feeds. You do not have to compare yourself to unattainable beauty standards with photoshop and what, not every morning. Unfollow the pages which disrupt your peace. Remove/unfollow toxic friends, walk away from toxic friendships/relationships, and set your boundaries. We cannot control what other people think or say about us, neither what they do. But what we can do is; we can control ourselves, what we do, what we listen to, and what we see. It is sometimes our choice. Sometimes, you are just one click away from getting rid of the negativity of your life. You have not realized but, these things will ultimately hit on your inner peace.
15. Ask help/ Get professional help
Often, we cannot solve our problems 100% on our own. It is okay to ask for help from others when needed, and it is better to seek professional support for things out of control. It can be anything, whether it is your health, beauty needs, mental health, or even about how to do taxes. Do not be stuck and suffer alone; reach out, and ask for help.
If you read till here, you will realize how all this affects you and, self-care is something beyond a pretty face. You can see how each and everything has a connection like an ecosystem. Self-care is how you live your life in the way you want. You do not have to torture yourself to adopt someone else's way of living. Learn about yourself and create your way of taking care of yourself. I hope you have understood that self-care is not just the beauty products you use. I would love to emphasize again; beauty is always inside out. Go, find yourself; Give yourself time; Be gentle with yourself.
P.S: By writing this, is not imply I live a 100% perfect life with these. I also still on my journey. But, I wanted to share these things with you because that is what I have learned so far, and these things made a difference in me. I always try to be the better version of me.
“Our bodies are our gardens, to which our wills are gardeners”.
-William Shakespeare-
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